


All we Did was Suffer

by PoorUnfortunateSoul



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Blackwatch Era, Depression, F/F, F/M, Flashbacks, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Recall, Pre-Fall of Overwatch, Second Chances, Self-Acceptance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-05-01 14:00:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14522151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoorUnfortunateSoul/pseuds/PoorUnfortunateSoul
Summary: "You sure are different from before, Genji. Not bad, just... different."---------Or, Jesse has to get used to the fact that Genji doesn't need him as much as he did during their Blackwatch days.





	All we Did was Suffer

Jesse was warned beforehand about the new recruit.

 

“Just like you when you were first brought in,” Reyes had warned, “but five times as deadly.”

 

Still, Jesse can’t help himself from joining Genji on the couch. He’s been sitting here for four hours now, staring at a wall. Granted, Mercy and Ana worked hard to make this place seem like home to make things easier on the younger recruits, but he really doesn’t think the wallpaper is _that_ entertaining. The other man seemed to be very much in need of company.

 

“Hey, there. The names Jesse McCree,” he says, holding a hand out to Genji.

 

He flicks his crimson gaze to the offered hand, but otherwise doesn’t move. Okay, then, no touching. Jesse drops his hand.

 

“So, what brings you to Blackwatch?”

 

Genji says nothing.

 

“Not much of talker, huh?”

 

The other man finally looks at him, then, and the piercing red eyes makes him freeze.

 

“Have you considered,” Genji says, and the metallic yet still somehow human sounding voice throws him off, “that it’s just you I won’t speak to?”

 

Jesse knows it’s not true. Genji wouldn’t say three words to Reyes, and everyone else has the smarts to know that ignoring him is asking for death. Still, Jesse finds himself offended for a reason he can’t explain. Maybe it’s having his attempt at friendliness shut down like that.

 

“Well, shit,” Jesse says, “if you wanted me to leave, you could’ve just said so.”

 

“I see,” Genji says, “Then leave.”

 

Still offended and now speechless, Jesse gets up leaves the common room.

 

___________________

 

“Does something not sit with you right about the new guy?” Jesse asks, after a training session with Reyes.

 

His commander cracks his neck and looks at him.

 

“What, he hurt your feelings because he doesn’t want to be friends?” Reyes teases.

 

_Yes._

 

“No,” Jesse lies, “it just seems like he’d kill you in your sleep and have no remorse.”

 

“Not Reyes,” a voice says behind him, “but you, maybe.”

 

Jesse swears and whirls around to find Genji standing directly in his personal space. Reyes practically dies of laughter behind him.

 

“How the Hell did you sneak in here without me hearing you?”

 

Genji looks down at himself, and then at Jesse.

 

“Are you familiar with the concept of ninjas, McCree?” Genji asks, and Reyes chokes on his laughter again.

 

Jesse flips them both off of as he says, “Fuck both of you.”

 

He leaves the training area, and hears Reyes praise Genji for ‘putting the little shit in his place.’ Screw them, honestly.

 

_______________

 

“Shit, Darlin’,” Jesse pants, “Anyone ever tell you how good you are with that sword?”

 

Genji freezes and Jesse fears that he somehow hit a nerve. As soon the moment has began, it’s passed, and Genji puts his sword away like nothing happened.

 

“Plenty of times,” Genji says. From anyone else, Jesse might’ve assumed that it was a boast. However, Genji almost says it disdainfully. “Has anyone ever told you that a middle part does not look good on anyone?”

 

Any sympathy that Jesse might’ve started feeling for the other man is gone as quickly as it came.

 

“I was complimenting you,” Jesse complains.

 

Genji doesn’t look impressed.

 

“And I was giving you advice that may help you receive more compliments.”

 

Jesse stutters incoherently. Genji raises an eyebrow.

 

“I receive _plenty_ of compliments, thank you.”

 

“Ana’s don’t count.”

 

“I - well - I don’t - _fuck_ you,” Jesse says, before stomping out of the training room.

 

He’s not sure why he even bothers talking to the damn ninja. Their conversations always go the same way, and you’d think he’d have learned by now. _Idiot._

 

________________

 

All things considered, Genji is more emotionally fragile than anyone Jesse has ever known. He has a quick tongue and even quicker wit, but he hesitates, sometimes. In those few and far between moments, Genji looks so unsure of himself. Conflict that Jesse can’t relate crosses his face, but it’s gone in an instant, back to natural; back to his mask of indifference.

 

But those moments don’t get passed Jesse. He sees each and every one of them, and it’s always a shock to see Genji seem so vulnerable.

 

He doesn’t know what brought Genji here. Jesse knows that it must be bad, since Angela is the one that gave Genji his new body. Whatever brought him here nearly got him killed, and Jesse knows better than to ask about it, now. Especially after seeing Genji throw another agent twice his size half way across the room after he pushed a little too hard for the details.

 

So, Jesse doesn’t ask about those moments of vulnerability. However, he does slowly accumulate the reasons that Genji shows them, and uses that mental stock to make sure he doesn’t trigger an angry episode in the ninja; Jesse - finally - values his life, thank you very much.

 

Still, even though he knows it’s not a good idea, he can’t help himself from following Genji out of the training room after another agent, too stupid to realize it was rude, tried to take off Genji’s face plate without asking. Jesse finds him just outside, crouched down with his head between his knees, hands clutched protectively over the latches of his face plate.

 

“You alright, darlin’?” Jesse asks.

 

He expects Genji to tell him that he’s fine, or maybe to fuck off.

 

What he gets, is a small and honest, “No.”

 

Jesse crouches down next to him, and places a tentative hand on his back. He doesn’t even know if Genji can feel it anymore, but he hopes it’s reassuring.

 

“De’Stil is an idiot,” he tries, and Genji trembles under his hand.

 

“I don’t… want anyone to see.”

 

Jesse smiles sadly.

 

“I think I got that part. Don’t worry, sugar; no one here is gonna try to look.”

 

Genji nods, and slowly moves his hands from the latches. Jesse coaxes him into a more comfortable sitting position.

 

“Stay?” Genji asks, and he sounds like someone who expects and has prepared themselves for rejection.

 

“Darlin’, the only way you’d get me to leave you now is if you struck me down with that sword of yours.”

 

A tremor runs through Genji’s body, and Jesse stores it with the rest of “Do Not Say to Genji Ever if You Want to Live” file in his brain. True to his word, Jesse stays until Genji feels up to moving again.

 

Jesse walks him back to his room, both of them knowing that the ninja is too spent emotionally for training today. He thinks, as he waves goodbye to Genji, that maybe he keeps trying because, deep down, he knows that Genji needs him to.


End file.
